Review of Motivate Your Child

If you've been following this blog or my Facebook posts, you know I've been reading a new book called Motivate Your Child and serving on their launch team.    The book was released this week and I'm so excited to share why I would encourage you all to

BUY IT NOW!

My hubby and I first learned about the National Association of Biblical Parenting when we attended a conference last October.    We purchased a few other books by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller and have been devouring them at home.    You see at that time, we were feeling a bit desperate.   Our 4-year-old was putting me through the ringer with his behaviors.    You name it, I feel like we were living it.    And in spite of finally living out my dream of being a full time at home Momma, I was having some serious doubts about my ability to parent this little guy.   In short, he was basically running our family!
A few months and a few books later, our household is much different.    There is a more peace, far fewer behaviors and huge growth and changes in our little guy.    That's when I heard about the new book and the opportunity to serve on the launch team.    I jumped at the opportunity to share these strategies with other parents who might feel as though I did.

Here are my thoughts on Motivate Your Child:

 Part 1 - Moral Development in Children:
This section focuses on helping your child recognize and respond to both external and internal motivations, as well as strategies for helping them to become more independent in doing what needs to be done in family life.

Part 2 - Spiritual Development in Children:
This sections focuses on the importance of developing your child's spiritual relationship with God through weekly family time, relationships building as well as living your faith out in front of your children.

There were so many useful nuggets for my family that I would likely produce a whole new book.    I'll spare you that.   Some notable changes within our family since reading this book are:

• Our 4-year-old now feeds the dog both morning and night with very few reminders.   If he forgets, we prompt him to check his room to make sure all morning responsibilities are done (am feeding) or stand near the sign posted in the living room (pm feeding).    We have only had to do that a handful to times.
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• The words initiative, responsibility and honor are currently used daily in conversations as we identify behaviors driven by them in our son.    He has a great love of language and so we have had some pretty awesome conversations about what these words mean and why they are important.
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• All this conversations has lead to some pretty awesome discussions about God and Jesus.    And that's sent us back into my son's Bible.    I love that specific stories are always referenced with where to find them in the Bible.    It gives me an opportunity to directly connect what I'm learning back to the Bible in context, as well as an opportunity to find the passage in my son's Bible to further our conversations.

But the biggest nugget I  have walked away from after reading this book, is that it's not just my son who needed to make a few heart adjustments.    Through reading this book, I have adjusted the way I would have responded to a situation on many occasions.    It has given me pause to reflect on what my own conscience and heart are reflecting and when I have stopped and allowed myself to change my own heart the situation resolved for the better 100% of the time.

Here are the links to my other posts on this book that provide some pretty cool illustrations of the change in my little guy!   I'm so proud of the growth in him, and in our family in general.

Only a few pages in and this book is awesome!
A parenting Win!  My Son took the Initiative!


On a final note, there is still time to take advantage of the awesome freebies being given away when you order Motivate Your Child before 1/31.  

And make sure you check out the Facebook Party tomorrow 1/29 from 9:00-11:00 EST.    You'll be able to ask questions directly to the books authors as well as be entered into more cool prizes.    Click on the party details to RSVP.

Singlemindedness

Yesterday at church, our pastor spoke about the idea of being single-minded.   Admittedly when I picked up my copy of the sermon notes and saw the title, I was a little confused.   You see my brain determined that that meant narrow minded and I couldn't for the life of me figure out how that fit in with what I know about having a relationship with Jesus.   Thankfully, I was quickly set straight from my self confessed blond moment.

So single-mindedness is really all about being focused on one thing and making sure all of your decisions direct you at that.   It's an idea that's been talked around me in several areas of my life recently, and I'm pretty sure that was laying the ground work for bringing it all together yesterday.  

All In.  Live Intentionally.  Hit The Bulls Eye.  Single-Mindedness

They are all really synonyms in my world.   They remind me that I am part of something greater, called for something more.    And that wherever I am, whomever I'm with, I am called to love and serve accordingly.    Pretty awesome stuff, if you ask me.

"Whatever you do, do with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters." (Colossians 3:23)

I love this verse and think that it epitomizes the concept of single-mindedness so well.   As a Christians, the end of the verse is really speaks to where my single-mindedness is focused.   Every choice I make in my life should reflect this, and I do my very best to do so.  In my home, in our business and in every encounter I have with another person, it is my prayer that I am doing my best to love and serve them and bring glory to Him.

Whether you're a believer or not (though I'd love to share with you why this was the best decision in my life), this idea is a powerful one that will serve you well too if you apply.    What do you go All In for?   What are you single-mindedly focused on?  How are you living intentionally so as to make the most out of each and every day?

If you haven't thought about this, I encourage you to do so.   Because when you start to live this way, you'll be blown away by what happens.   Those goals, dreams and hopes that may seem like they can never be will suddenly be within your reach.

And if you've stopped dreaming, here's a fun little activity to try.   Create a dream (aka vision) board.  Be inspired by photos and words and put them down on something you can see regularly.   I had the opportunity to do this last night and it such a cool way to remind you of your purpose or focus.   Here's a picture of mine.  It's not hanging just to the left of my desk as a reminder of why I'm doing what I do.

A Parenting Win! My Son Took The Initiative

You may or may not remember, but I've been reading this book called Motivate Your Child.  It's all about helping kids learn to respond appropriately to their consciences, and teach them to be motivated to do what needs to be done.   I could go on and on about how powerful this book has been at shaping the way I approach the many teachable moments that I encounter daily with our four year old and two year old.

But that's another post, that shall be known as the review when I finish the book.

Today I want to share just one nugget of impact on my family.   We've been slowly introducing more responsibility around the house and within the family to Hayden.   He is in charge of feeding our dog Koru in the morning and the evening.   Until recently getting the task done required that either my hubby or I specifically asked him to feed the dog.

Mind you this was a win, as we've been working hard on obedience prior to this point.    Want some tips on that one?  Then, you've got to read Parenting is Heartwork.  

Motivate Your Child has helped me to understand the importance of teaching our kids the value of taking the initiative.    I decide that the task of feeding the dog was a great place to start working on this.     Here's what we did:

Across the few days leading up to now, I've started including the word initiative in conversations and pointing out times when Hayden was doing it.    He has a love of all things language so he quickly asked what that word meant.     I explained to him that it meant doing what needs to be done, without being asked.    After learning the meaning of the word, he swelled with pride when I called him out on it.

Yesterday morning, at family breakfast,  we talked about his task of feeding the dog.   I explained to him that we (hubby and I) thought this was a great responsibility for him as he was growing up.   We talked about how we all have responsibilities to the family to make sure we are the best Team Butcher we can be.    Then I shared with him that it seemed like he always needed a reminder to get his job done.   He agreed.

I told him I had an idea that might help him take initiative with this task.    He perked right up.  I told him that grown ups often use cues to help them remember things, and gave him a couple of examples.   Then I asked him if he had any ideas about types of cues we could use to help him remember his job so that we didn't always have to ask him to do it.    With a little nudging, and some pretty darn cute but impractical ideas, he decided that a picture cue would be the most helpful.   Involving him in the process was important to me, because I wanted him to have ownership over the responsibility.   But as any good teacher would, I guided him towards the cue I thought would help him the most.

Later that morning, we drew some picture cues.    Hayden does not like fine motor activities so I choose them wisely for the greatest impact.   Because my greater goals was helping him take initiative, I did most of the drawing (yes, I draw like a child myself).  Here's what we came up with:

Morning Cue

Evening Cue

 Each picture includes a picture of a dog and a bowl, the words "feed the dog" and cues as to the time of day.    Hayden decided where they should be placed in order to best help him remember and there we hung them.

So what happened after that you ask.................

This Mommy was blown away by how quickly Hayden took the initiative on his responsibility.   Both occasions following the creation of the picture cues, Hayden independently found me in the house and told me he had to feed the dog.   He then did what needed to be done to make that happen without any reminders from me.    After completing a happy dance for a parenting win (you know you do that too), I loved on my little man and we celebrated this moment together.

I can't wait to see where his next area of growth is.   He has responded so well to the strategies we've employed from both Parenting is Heartwork and Motivate Your Child and an our entire family is benefiting in becoming a stronger family as these strategies work for mommies and daddies, too!

Family Breakfast - A New Family Routine

When I retired from teaching, I had this grand idea that we would be able to enjoy dinner as a family every night.   After all, I would have much more flexibility in my day to prep and cook a meal.  But, what my dream failed to take into account was that while I was home all day, my husband's schedule was still controlled by his job.  

So I tried it for a while!   Sure, we sat down and prayed as a family once I rushed my husband into the house and told him he couldn't change out of his work clothes.    If you stopped by for one of those meals, you'd probably get a good laugh.   The meals often consisted of each of us coaxing a very tired child who had little interest in eating, because I'd given them a snack an hour before to hold them over, to sit and pray and eat.   If they didn't like the meal that was prepared it took extra effort.    After several minutes we'd give up, and hubby and I would resort to shoveling food into our mouth so that we could move the kids into their bedtime routine.

This didn't last very long before I decided something had to be different.   I asked hubby if he preferred family dinner time or would he prefer to have the kids fed, bathed and ready to play.   He chose the latter.   And boy do I love watching him play with our kids.   This worked well for our family, for the most part.

You see, I still had this grand idea that my family should be gathering at the table at least once per day so that we could talk, pray together, and just connect.    A big reason we decided that I should be at home was to focus on our family, which previously had very little time to spend together at all.   So I decided to do something, perhaps less conventional for the average family, but would work perfectly for ours.

I instituted family breakfast!   We made a few changes to our previous routine, selected a time that would allow for eating (and some playing) and put this new routine into action.   AND I LOVE IT!

What does family breakfast consist of?  I've been trying new healthy recipes, so as a family we are getting to try lots of new things.    We spend some time praying together and chatting about our days and we have a question of the day (Tabletopics).  Hayden loves being in charge of getting the question box.    We've also given him the responsibility to call the family to the table at 7:00 and are working on helping him to do this independently.  (Sidenote: I learned this from this awesome book I'm reading called Motivate Your Child)

We are three days in and have no plans to stop.   I'm praying that over time this will become a treasured time for our family.  It may be non-traditional but it was what works for our family in this season.  

What are your treasured family routines?

P.S.  Our favorite breakfast so far has been Peanut Butter Cookie Overnight Oats It's packed with protein, and super tasty.   So tasty that we're making it again tomorrow!

It is as good as it looks.  Click on the link for the recipe.

Completely Satisfied and Yet Not Satisfied at All

"It always sticks in my head that you have your teaching credentials and are completely satisfied."

I received those words in a text yesterday and they caused me to pause.   I am completely satisfied.   I am home with my children full time getting to pour into them each and every day.  I have a husband who loves and supports me even when I come to him with the craziest of ideas; you know like leaving my teaching job we'd spent 7 years and $$$$ helping me build.  And, I'm blessed to count some pretty amazing people as my friends and have new opportunities to meet more amazing people each and every day. In a nutshell, I'm living my purpose and spending each of my days fulfilling my calling.

But you know what, it wasn't always this way.   Just 6 months ago my life looked very different.   It was good, but it was not the life I was called to live.   I had a good job as a special education teacher.   After 2 years of trying and a year of fertility treatments I had two beautiful perfectly healthy children.   We had a roof over our heads and all of our need and wants were being met.  And that same fantastic husband was by my side rooting me on even then.

On the outside, it looked like I had it all.   But on the inside I was drowning in the time debt.   Those beautiful babies I worked so hard to have were being dropped off for 8-9 hours a time to be loved on by someone else.   On a good day I got to hold and love and play with them more than 2 hours.  I'm pretty sure I saw my hubby even less.   All my life I had wanted to be a stay at home Mom, but I didn't believe there was way.  So I accepted that being a teacher was the best job I could have (side note - I loved being a teacher but my heart's desire was to be home with my children) because I got to be with kids all day and have chunks of time to be with my kids.    So I accepted this as truth and life went on.

A lot can change in 6 months and I'm so thankful that it has.   The Lord has opened so many doors since that time.   And my friend statement was spot on.  I am completely satisfied.   I love the life I've been given and the opportunities that I've been presented with.

But.....

I'm also completely dissatisfied!  You see I know the way I'm not the only one who has ever felt this way.  In fact in the last two years I've heard versions of my story over and over again.   Stories filled with hopelessness.    And knowing that fires me up, because I've got a servant's heart and it is fired up for finding others who need to know the truth.   That you too can be living a life where you are completely satisfied! 

I'm on a mission to help others live out their dreams, whatever they may be, and I WON'T be satisfied until I can make the same statement about them.   It's a big mission, but once you know that truth you just can't keep it to yourself.    You don't have to live your life in a massive time debt.   You can raise your children yourself if you want to.   You can be completely satisfied, too!

Under Construction

For those of you who have been reading for the entirety of this short blogs life, I thank you for sticking by me as the blog goes under construction.   I've been praying about a vision and purpose for sharing my heart and have been granted clarity.  So now I'm in the process of revamping the visual image and reorganizing to that the blog fulfills its purpose.   Stay tuned........

Motivate Your Child Giveaway!

So I mentioned that I'm on the launch team this new book Motivate your Child in my last post.   I'm a bit further into the book and already have gathered useful parenting tips that have had a big impact in our family.   My sweet boisterous boy loves to talk his way out of doing what is asked of him and struggles with obedience.    After reading about action points, or rather that seemingly magical point our children know that let's them know we mean business (in my house it was use of your full name), we decided to make a change.   Kevin and I had noticed that our action point usually came at that moment of frustration.    Now, most of the time (I'm still practicing), I prime Hayden that an instruction is coming by telling him I'm going to ask him to do something right now.   Then I give the direction again using the word now.   Most of the time he does it right away.  If he doesn't, instead of getting frustrated, I simply remind him that he is being disobedient and move uncomfortably close to him.    That has sent him off to his task every time.    Our home is a bit more peaceful and I have lots more opportunities to praise my little guy!

I can't believe the changes in our family, and I still have 2/3 of the book to go.   If you're looking for a way to help your children develop their conscience and internal motivation I would strongly recommend this book.    And if you like free stuff, do it sooner rather than later (1/31)

 To enter into this amazing giveaway, just join the Facebook Launch Party on 1/29 at 9pm EST

To celebrate the release of Motivate Your Child: A Christian Parent's Guide to Raising Kids Who Do What They Need to Do Without Being Told,  members of the Launch Team are sharing a wonderful giveaway filled with a Go Pro Camera, $50 Mardel Gift Card, $25 Amazon Gift Card, and book bundles from both the National Center for Biblical Parenting and Thomas Nelson Publishing! Three winners will win prizes with a total value of nearly $800! Here’s what you could win: 

GRAND PRIZE  ($500+ value)

Go Pro HERO3+ Silver Camera ($300 value)

HERO3+ Silver captures gorgeous, professional-quality 1080p60 video and 10MP photos at speeds of up to 10 frames per second. Built-in Wi-Fi enables you to use the GoPro App to control the camera remotely, preview shots and share your favorites on Facebook, Twitter and more. Compatible with all GoPro mounts, you can wear it or attach it to your gear for immersive POV footage of your favorite activities. It’s waterproof to 131’ (40m) and built tough for all of life’s adventures. Combined with stunning low-light performance, high-performance audio and an ultra wide-angle glass lens, HERO3+ Silver makes capturing and sharing your life easier than ever.  

NCBP Book Bundle ($115 value)

 The Christian Parenting Handbook  and Companion Guide Parenting is Heart Work God's Awesome Story Hero Training Camp Children's Curriculum

 

Thomas Nelson Book Bundle ($90 value):

The Best Yes by Lysa TerKeurst  Desperate by Sarah Mae and Sally Clarkson   Say Goodbye to Survival Mode by Crystal Paine  All Pro Dad by Mark Merrill  The Passionate Mom by Susan Merrill 

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FIRST PRIZE ($165 value)

$50 Mardel Gift Card

 

NCBP Book Bundle ($115 value)

The Christian Parenting Handbook  and Companion Guide Parenting is Heart Work God's Awesome Story Hero Training Camp Children's Curriculum

***

SECOND PRIZE ($115 value)

$25 Amazon Gift Card

 

Thomas Nelson Book Bundle ($90 value):

The Best Yes by Lysa TerKeurst  Desperate by Sarah Mae and Sally Clarkson   Say Goodbye to Survival Mode by Crystal Paine

Wow! Only a few pages in and this book is awesome!

Do you like a good deal?  Check out this awesome book and if you order before 1/31/15 you get $150 of freebies!

I am excited to share with you about a new book I’m reading this month  Motivate Your Child: A Christian Parent's Guide to Raising Kids Who Do What They Need to Do Without Being Told.  Doesn’t that sound amazing? Isn't that what you want for your kids?

God's Word gives us a better way to parent, one that builds strong internal motivation in children. When parents change the way they parent, kids change the way they live.  Motivate Your Child is a practical book that explores a theology of internal motivation and then gives parents real-life solutions to equip their kids for life.

This is the newest book by parenting experts, Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN from the National Center for Biblical Parenting (NCBP), also authors of The Christian Parenting Handbook.  In order to motivate parents to Pre-Order the book, the NCBP is offering a $150 package of resources for FREE! There are video, audio and print items that can be used on a variety of devices. You can learn more on the book website.


You can Pre-Order the book now from any retailer, and then follow the instructions below.

INSTRUCTIONS: Purchase the book. Email the receipt to gift@biblicalparenting.org. The NCBP will send you the link and a special code to access these downloadable products. This offer is good until January 31, 2015.

CLICK HERE FOR MORE GREAT BIBLICAL PARENTING RESOURCES