Completely Satisfied and Yet Not Satisfied at All

"It always sticks in my head that you have your teaching credentials and are completely satisfied."

I received those words in a text yesterday and they caused me to pause.   I am completely satisfied.   I am home with my children full time getting to pour into them each and every day.  I have a husband who loves and supports me even when I come to him with the craziest of ideas; you know like leaving my teaching job we'd spent 7 years and $$$$ helping me build.  And, I'm blessed to count some pretty amazing people as my friends and have new opportunities to meet more amazing people each and every day. In a nutshell, I'm living my purpose and spending each of my days fulfilling my calling.

But you know what, it wasn't always this way.   Just 6 months ago my life looked very different.   It was good, but it was not the life I was called to live.   I had a good job as a special education teacher.   After 2 years of trying and a year of fertility treatments I had two beautiful perfectly healthy children.   We had a roof over our heads and all of our need and wants were being met.  And that same fantastic husband was by my side rooting me on even then.

On the outside, it looked like I had it all.   But on the inside I was drowning in the time debt.   Those beautiful babies I worked so hard to have were being dropped off for 8-9 hours a time to be loved on by someone else.   On a good day I got to hold and love and play with them more than 2 hours.  I'm pretty sure I saw my hubby even less.   All my life I had wanted to be a stay at home Mom, but I didn't believe there was way.  So I accepted that being a teacher was the best job I could have (side note - I loved being a teacher but my heart's desire was to be home with my children) because I got to be with kids all day and have chunks of time to be with my kids.    So I accepted this as truth and life went on.

A lot can change in 6 months and I'm so thankful that it has.   The Lord has opened so many doors since that time.   And my friend statement was spot on.  I am completely satisfied.   I love the life I've been given and the opportunities that I've been presented with.

But.....

I'm also completely dissatisfied!  You see I know the way I'm not the only one who has ever felt this way.  In fact in the last two years I've heard versions of my story over and over again.   Stories filled with hopelessness.    And knowing that fires me up, because I've got a servant's heart and it is fired up for finding others who need to know the truth.   That you too can be living a life where you are completely satisfied! 

I'm on a mission to help others live out their dreams, whatever they may be, and I WON'T be satisfied until I can make the same statement about them.   It's a big mission, but once you know that truth you just can't keep it to yourself.    You don't have to live your life in a massive time debt.   You can raise your children yourself if you want to.   You can be completely satisfied, too!